Absolutely! Here’s a humanized, chaotic rewrite of the article:
So, yeah, some Italian just took home Wimbledon. First time ever! As a fellow Italian, I guess now I should aim to do something equally groundbreaking? Suggestions, anyone? Seriously, drop me a comment if you’ve got any wild ideas. But for now, let me go back to my usual routine — the weekly XR news roundup. I swear I’ve done this a million times already.
Biggest News of the Week (I Think)
Check this out. So, XPANCEO in Dubai is now a full-on "unicorn" because, boom, they just got $250M in funding. They’re dabbling in smart contact lenses — you know, the sci-fi stuff. Apparently, some big shots at Opportunity Venture are throwing money at them. They say it might launch in 2026, but honestly? Feels a bit optimistic. I mean, I tried their prototype lenses once at AWE Europe. Yep, I wore ’em and they did cool techy stuff. Hope these guys pull it off and not just make niche products like, I dunno, diabetes-tracking lenses? Cheers to Roman and Valentyn for possibly making this a reality. Dubai trip someday, maybe?
More XR Stuff (I Guess)
Upload VR’s Summer Showcase 2025. Did they blow minds? Nah. Lots of small devs showing cool games, though. Like, Elsewhere Electric — that’s dropping soon, and oh, Ndreams’ new trailer for Reach? Pretty sick for VR fans. So many games, can’t list them all, but if you’re curious, read more somewhere else. I’m not a mind reader to know what you’re into…
Was Samsung Sleeping?
About that Samsung Unpacked thing — rumors were flying about this Project Moohan headset. Nada. Zip. Nothing was shown. Was it staged to tease us or something? Or maybe last-minute device tweaks? It’s like they want to keep us guessing. Or maybe the glass box display at AWE was just for fun, who knows?
Hey, Meta’s Spending Again!
So, Meta splurged $3.5B on Luxottica. Zuckerberg had hinted, and voilà, it happened. It’s like a pledge to stick their brand on everyone’s faces or something. Maybe next year we’ll all be walking with Meta-branded specs? Who knows.
Could Be True – Apple Rumors and More
Ah, Apple. Apparently, they’re going to refresh the Vision Pro with an M4 chip soon. Like, rumors keep swinging back and forth every week with new gossip. Anyone else feeling dizzy?
CREAL’s Mini Vision
CREAL, the Swiss geniuses making lightfield displays, just bagged $9M. Their thing? Making screens that let you feel depth, not the trippy kind, just visually. They’re shrinking their tech, so maybe soon I’ll wear their AR glasses and not look like a cyborg. Exciting!
Remember Intel’s RealSense? It’s Back-ish
Remember those funky Intel cameras that tracked your hands? Thought they were dead. But yeah, turns out RealSense is back as a new gig with $50M. Are they bringing back body tracking tech for XR? Maybe. Stay tuned.
Oh, Some Crazy World Record – VR LAN Party
Get this — a dude named Jeff organized a VR LAN party. 130 headsets in a warehouse somewhere. Why? Who knows, but visuals were nuts. Dude makes chopsticks and hosts VR events. Why the heck not?
Mentra’s Hackathon Extravaganza
Mentra, the open OS for smartglasses, threw a big hackathon. Something about creativity and innovation. Folks were buzzing on X (formerly Twitter). Kind of cool, if you’re into that stuff.
Rummaging Through Other News
- New indie games are hitting XR platforms left and right.
- That Beat Saber update with Billie Eilish? Yup, more virtual music fun.
- Zoom on Quest? Who’s asking for this? Seeing avatars in meetings? Meh.
And, okay, so here’s where I’d suggest giving back to the world — think of those affected by war and lend a hand through the Red Cross. Ends this chaotic brain dump.
(Header image by XPANCEO, in case you care.)
P.S. Spotted any typos? Pretend you didn’t. See ya!
