Eagleopolis Falls Despite Helldivers 2 Players Defeating 2.5 Billion Squids, Leaving Six Mega Cities to Defend in the Battle for Super Earth

Sure thing. Here’s a version that’s a bit more, well, tangled up and chatty:

—

So, here’s the deal—do you wanna hear the good stuff or the bad stuff? Let’s toss some good vibes your way first: Helldivers 2 pulled off a big win by taking out over two billion Illuminate. Crazy, right? But, bummer alert, Eagleopolis? Yeah, it’s toast.

Even with the biggest crew of Helldivers since, like, who knows when, all diving in to beat back the Illuminate goons, one of Super Earth’s seven massive cities still bit the dust. Tough times. Maybe grab your SEAF buddy for a hug? And maybe watch someone ride a Leviathan wave—it might cheer you up. Or maybe not. I dunno.

So, anyway—wait no, back to the point—last big mission was defending Super Earth from Illuminate invaders. Sounds fun, doesn’t it? They came running in with the Heart of Democracy update, and thank heavens, those 2.5 billion Illuminate got cleared out. So, party time, right?

Nah. Arrowhead gave us the bad news: “Eagleopolis, a noble bastion of Managed Democracy, is dust,” they said. Man, the shopping centers are basically ghost towns. A lesson to everyone else on Super Earth about what could happen if—no, scratch that—when the mission hits the fan.

So, yup, one massive city down, but we’re still slogging away at this battle for Super Earth. Some folks are making headway though, trying to send the Illuminate packing or just erase them for good.

Oh, and the Illuminate fleet’s strength is down to 49% or something, Arrowhead notes. Six Mega Cities still stand strong, but darn it, Helldivers need to hold the line with their SEAF pals. They must defend these last heartbeats of our Federation ’cause once a city falls, it’s gone for good. Nope, no take-backs.

Current game plan? Just, you know, complete missions against the Illuminate 20 million times. Yep, “20 million” with an M—to smack that health bar down. Plus, avenge poor Eagleopolis because I bet folks on the Helldivers subreddit are a tad upset. But they’re kinda busy drawing art of their SEAF buddies, which is, um, wholesome? Maybe a bit too much sometimes.

So, are you bawling for Eagleopolis? Spoiler: let us know down below!